A question I get all the time, from clients and strangers alike, is, “Do dating apps work?” »
Here’s the thing: any app can be effective or successful, depending on what you post and how proactive you are in the process. If you put up six mediocre photos and no copywriting and expect to attract quality people, you will be deeply disappointed.
Dating apps *are* an effective tool for meeting someone (note that I didn’t say “find a relationship”, since that’s only based on the two people involved). But, there are a few basic rules you need to follow to give yourself the best chance:
Let’s talk pictures:
Make the first photo a clear photo of your face. People just want to see who is going to show up on the date. No more no less.
Include a full body photo. Provide people with an idea of what you look like so they don’t have to make it up.
Be alone in the process. Trust me here. It is important that the viewer knows who you are in the photos. Don’t worry if someone asks if you have friends. First, no one thinks about it, and second, what if they think your friend is cuter than you?
Have a photo of you doing something interesting. Most people have no idea what to write in the initial message, so give them some “message bait”.
Less is more. Four great photos will always win out over six or more mediocre photos. Unfortunately, people will look for the one they don’t like and decide not to swipe right because of it.
As for the profile itself, on apps like Bumble and Hinge, write something short, sweet, and quirky. Here are three examples:
Two truths and a lie: 1) My favorite drink is scotch, 2) I was born outside the United States, 3) I have a dog named Scruffy.
What I like: pizza (only with red sauce, the white is a parody!), Ted Lasso, my job in finance and spontaneous games of ping-pong.
Entrepreneur, pun, crossword… the math jokes and the whiskey make me swoon. Like a cupcake with a jalapeno in the middle – sweetened with a kick!
Now let’s talk about messages. Keep them short, sweet, and end with a question. Remember that *anything* is better than “Hey” or “What’s up?”
Examples when no “message bait” is provided:
You seem like a really happy person…am I right?
*pizza emoji* or *sushi emoji*?
If you had nothing to do today, would you rather go for a run or drink a bottle of wine…or both? No judgment!
And finally, let’s talk about the actual date. If you’re corresponding with someone on a Sunday, try setting the date for the following Sunday (basically, keep it within the week). Momentum is essential, as people have increasingly short attention spans.
So, do dating apps work? Sure. But you need to put in the work, follow these tips, and show up to your dates ready and excited to meet someone new. There’s no guarantee how you’ll click with someone whether you meet online or not, but you might as well give yourself the best chance.
Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, where she helps others navigate the often daunting world of online dating. Want to get in touch with Erika? Join his newsletter, eepurl.com/dpHcH for updates and tips.